||[Oct. 25th, 2006|10:01 am]
so today im skipping my class to come to the library. lame i know but i feel like ive earned a day... not really im just not too keen on seeing him there again.|
so im doing better. i took yesterday to kind of clean out my system. i didnt eat anything until 11:00 and that was just because i was going grocery shopping, very dangerous on an empty stomach. i dont have a camera and i think that is good because i think that just adds to stress. so im keeping a log of my food intake for this class im taking and i thought about lying and making up a whole bunch of stuff, or leaving out when i eat too much, but ive decided that im just going to be honest. its not like she cares what i do or dont eat. if i were underweight she might get concerned but as far as she knows im just an average girl who has odd eating habits.
my theory has always been that its not a problem until someone notices. no one notices when its me... at least not yet. i dont think its a problem. its really mental right now, my weight is dropping but nothing awful or major. in the past month ive gone from 120 to 111... not bad..
im trying to focus on eating only healthy things when i do actually eat and eating one thing. like an apple, or a roll. or a carrot. when i eat more than one thing, things start to get messy...
thats all for today... see you next time <30~