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i have a plan [Dec. 7th, 2006|11:47 am]
i will reach my goal by february 2 if i stick with it. im nervous because i plan things alot to make myself feel better but this time it feels different. i think its going to work. im not too worried about weight this time. i know what i need to lose to get to the BMI i want. i was taking this class and we did this whole body composition thing and i came to realize that my lean muscle mass is great and my fat percentage is ... well WAY to high, but my BMI disgusted me. i want it back to where it was the last time i checked it.

plus, ive had MANY comments about my weight lately. my brother always says im too small, my family does too, but then my brothers friends tell me i need to workout more to lose weight, and my boyfriends brother in law told me the other day that i needed to lose some weight because there wasnt enough room on the bench we were sitting on. he is like the size of my arm so i guess he has the right to judge... im fat i know, duly noted.. moving on

im going to succeed this time. there is no reason not to. i figured out that the reason so many models and big entertainment figures are able to get so small is because their lives are so busy and focused on what they look like. i dont want to be so focused on what i look like, but rather the busy part. i have A LOT of things i want to do and need to accomplish and i really shouldnt waste time sitting around!

so, back to the goal.... im doing it. its already in the works and i am down 4 lbs since. im losing some muscle but weight is weight.... and i cant think of it as fat, water, muscle... whatever it is its making me too heavy. its good to see that number going down again. ah such a relief.

[User Picture]From: butyourown
2007-01-16 03:07 am (UTC)
heyy. I just saw your post in one of the communities we're both in, and wanted to comment on how well written it was.

I'm sorry you're feeling so down. *hug*

Anddd, I wondered if you wanted to be friends? heh

thanks a bunch deary,
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